About Love III. Love is everywhere. Just look around. So many people you see everyday. All of them with their own stories, their needs, desires and disappointments. Third in row talking about his experiences is Jersey.

"If my parents say something that touches me, I just try to be distant and empty"

On May 25th, Jersey turns eighteen. This will be the happiest day of her life. Then she can redeem herself from her parents. Parents who do not understand her. Parents who don't want to know about her boyfriend. Parents who don't really know their daughter any longer, because Jersey is pretending for years.

By Dominique Verschuren

Jersey: "No single night goes by without crying. My parents are so against me. I don't know what I can improve to make them happy. The only thing I really want, my friend, they try to take away from me. I have a lot of nightmares. I can't tell my parents, because they even more withdraw and I do not want that. I do not know what I can do. In the evening I think how I can change so they would accept him. But I find no solution, except... the only thing I really don't want, and that's leaving him. "

Because he wanted

"My boyfriend is nine years older. I met him two years ago know. I was fifteen years old and student employee at my father's work. He still had a girlfriend and they didn't go very well together. And between us getting better. I don't want to steal someone from someone else. But then came that opportunity and we took it. Two years later we're still together.

To his former girlfriend I don't have hard feeling. I was jealous when he spend evenings at home and was with her and not with me. Naturally my feelings said: let those two split up so he can be with me. But when they are together and they are happy together, who am I to break it? If my current boyfriend hadn't been there, I would have looked further.

I would do anything I can to make him happy, and put my own happiness aside. But I wouldn't let him lead. I used to do that, let myself fully guided by what my ex-boyfriend wanted. I have many regrets. I haven't done things because he didn't want to. My current boyfriend is very different, he is always there for me. We miss each other so much that we might go too fast and do stupid things. I am the one who stands on the brakes. I'm very afraid for my parents. My parents are not happy with the choice of my boyfriend. He works very hard, he tries to help everyone. I don't understand why my parents think so negative about my friend. Friends of my dad started to say: "They have been together for so long, it's serious. Isn't time to set them free? '"

"Inside I'm broken"

"I've always had a very good relationship with my parents, especially with my dad. Due to seeing my current boyfriend, I have the impression that my dad feels unnecessary. He is afraid of losing me. They are very similar, they often think the same. Lately they try, unconsciously I think, to be the completely opposite of each other. A kind of competition. My dad doesn't want to lose me, my friend doesn't want to lose me. I think my dad is jealous because I can be happy with someone else, with someone who is so much older and who resembles him so much.

The relationship with my boyfriend is very under pressure. We know that if we do something wrong now, it can go very badly. Often we're standing on an edge. In the beginning the response was: 'Your friend is ruining your life, you don't know what you're starting." Now I'm proving that he is better, and I think my parents can't accept that. Since I am with my friend, my school results are better than ever before. It has to be good now, then we can leave the problems behind and being together.

I am proving myself. It is a craving for recognition. This recognition for what I do, I miss. That they would say spontaneously that they saw it wrong and they see we do our best and make every attempt to do it right. They let me loose for all things which have nothing to do with my boyfriend. But if it has to do with him they keep me short. Every time they make a fuzz, I try to find a solution so that there's no longer a problem to make. Then they find always a reason why they don't like him. I don't know why. If I ask, I always get different answers. First it was the age, but I feel much older than I am. I can't imagine that I would be together with someone my own age. Those boys are just not on the same wavelength. Those older guys have experienced more, they know more.

I'm trying to act now as happy as possible, so my parents don't see it, but inside I'm really broken. I have often tried to tell them. But their only response was screaming at me. More and more I close myself for my parents. If my parents say something that touches me, I just try to be distant and empty. The last two years I have played someone else.

There were days that I wanted to grab my bag with clothes to leave, but I couldn't because I love my parents. That bag is still in my closet and I'll probably never use it. But knowing that the bag is in my closet, gives me a sense of peace.

Super Lucky in Love

"If I forget my problems I'm super happy in love. (Laughs)

I'm really tired. Tired of fighting. I'm exhausted. I always try to be strong so nobody sees it, the only person who knows how devastated I am is my friend. I maintain by thinking it's going to be okay. Sometimes I can't stand it anymore and then I have to say: "Stop!" Think about my own happiness. But I try as much as possible to please everyone and keep my own happiness aside. So far it works pretty good.

I've always said, if my parents continue to do as they do now, forbid everything, I'll leave on my eighteenth. I'll be left on May 25th of next year. That is not so long, the stress starts to increase. I've been through so much misery, pretending I was happy while I wasn't. I'm not afraid of that day, May 25th, I am already preparing for so long. About what I'm saying, how I'm going to say, where I'm going to say... How will my parents react, in what situation are we? Hopefully they will understand me if I'm going to explain. Really afraid of that date, no, my friend longs for so long. And me too, but I've always been afraid for change. I can conform very well, but I'm always afraid for change."